Tuesday, July 29, 2014

Another Door Opens

8 weeks Lincoln has been at this new school.  In 8 weeks time he has transformed so much!  He is where he is suppose to be I know that for a fact now.  Lincoln is using more and more language.  I was very concerned he would have echolalia, but he doesn't. Here are the positives we are seeing"
- He now regularly tells us drink, eat, bite.
-He is also responding with yes and no. Head shaking and verbally
-He is saying hi and bye. 
- He is FINALLY showing interest in potty training!
-He sits still much longer than he used to
-He is understanding sequences of events and everything
- He can follow 2 part commands (granted you have to keep repeating the commands lol)
-His impulses which were insane have slowed down! 
-He is showing more signs of thought processing and thinking before acting. 
-He is showing more and more patience.
video






I'm so happy we decided to take the plunge for Lincolns school.  It's been worth every expensive penny.  He will start Kindergarten there in a few weeks !  I believe he will be 1 of 4 students with 2 teachers. He will be getting a lot of 1 on 1 attention! I strongly urge other parents to take the plunge. We are investing in him and his betterment.  We can take him to doctor after doctor, but what has to take place is rewiring/training of his brain.  I do feel the medical intervention helps some, but with age as well as him overcoming so much health wise- we are on the right track. His allergies are far less, his asthma is FINALLY (hallelujah!)  under control, eczema is almost absolute, and he stays on daily probiotics.

This is his daily medication we do now.
-Risperdal - 1 1/2 tablet daily . We can give 2 tablets daily, but we try not to unless he is very "stressed"
- Probiotics
-Dulera- Asthma inhaler

I'm about to try a new Mighty Enzyme to help his digestion as well.  I'll report on it as well later.  I've done essential oils, not a fan with him. I do feel they are a great thing for most, but we saw little to no change.
 
 
 
 


SO yeah... We are trucking on.  I think I've finally come to terms with this isn't going to be an overnight fix. This is going to be something we work at super hard for the next ever.  We are going to be investing everything we have in him. The moment when he tells us thank for not giving up on me, will be worth it all.  I know he is in there and he is coming back to us SLOWLY.  He will always be my autistic child. He will always be different, but I pray, believe, and have hope that we will be mainstream one day if we keep on. 




Thursday, May 22, 2014

One door Closes

Today was the end of Lincoln's career at his preschool.  It is with a VERY VERY sad heart that we are leaving.  We have a place in line for his continued care, but I cannot begin to describe the emotion it is leaving our current routine/class.  Here is a little bit about our time there:

I sent Lincoln knowing they were going to feed him peanuts ---They didn't :)
I sent Lincoln making 0 eye contact-------------He gladly makes eye contact now
I sent Lincoln at age 3year1month----------------He --is now 4year 10month
I sent Lincoln with 0 words-----------------------------He now has several key terms and I hear                                                                                                                  Momma daily!
I sent Lincoln who showed  0 emotions----- He now shows emotions (Anger& Feelings hurt)
I sent Lincoln showing 0 empathy----------------Today he wiped tears from my eyes and showed concern.
I sent a toddler -----------------------Today I brought home  a little boy :)

It is emotional leaving individuals who care and showed so much love towards my child.  They have touched our hearts with love for Lincoln.  They have been a blessing and I'm sure Lincoln too has been for them.   I am eager to bring him back in a few years a different child who continues to improve and grow. They were apart of that and deserve to see the child he will become.  Goodbye DNES!

 If anyone has a child who is delayed , please go to Early Intervention!  As our journey is now over through EI and the EI type preschool, I am glad I was told about this service.




Lincoln's 1st day at DNES



Lincoln's 1st day of DNES ROUND 2

LAST DAY AT DNES




JUST RANDOM PICS TO SEE HOW MUCH YOU CAN SEE LIFE/LIGHT IN HIM VS BEFORE
















Love is something you search for and your looking for this perfect guy. The one that melts you with every look, every smile.  I hate to break it to Miles, but this little boy is the guy I searched for.  He is a light on a dark day, he is going to be my biggest challenge, my biggest reward, and he will save all 4 of us one way or another. He is one of the only people that drives me insane and gives me great joy in a matter of 20 min :)

Monday, October 21, 2013

What a difference a few months makes!

Lincoln is progressing well! He is much calmer. He is vocalizing more words. He is putting more than one word together. All of which are still on his terms, but we are seeing more.  School reports he is doing well also!

Lincoln is actually the least of my troubles these days.  I had a week long hospital stay recently for a virus.  Then Miles was furloughed for 3 weeks.  We survived well ! Miles finally talked me into taking Lynleigh to the doctor during his furlough. She is always tired has been for 6 months at least.  I thought, eh just some iron issue.  Well now I'm wishing it were just iron.  Here is what has gone down.

Tuesday 10/15
Initial appointment/CBC thyroid check.  Hemoglobin is at an 8.6! She was 13 in April.  For those of you unaware.  12+ is what it should be . Anything under 8, you are considered for a blood transfusion.

Thursday 10/17
Our doctor didn't want to just throw some iron at her, without getting to the source of the problem. So we brought in 3 poopy diapers and did a large panel of blood on her.

Friday 10/18
The doctor informs me her blood is down to 8.2. She had 2 trace positive stools for blood.  Also we aren't dealing with an iron deficiency  He wanted me to come in first thing Monday morning for another hemoglobin and he would get us in with a hematologist ASAP .

Monday 10/21
Hemoglobin is 8.3 , so no change really.  The peripheral smear came back and 1 strain of cells wasn't right.  It was one dealing with red blood cells, unsure what the one was called. This allows us to rule out a GI issue since it's obviously in the blood.  He got us an appointment on 10/24 with a hematologist/oncologist in Birmingham.  Some of the scarier things such as leukemia can't be ruled out fully until more labs/bone marrow aspiration.  The idea of an illness called Transient erythroblastopenia. I'm not buying it.  They say they are healed by 2weeks to 2 months on it . Lynleigh has been "tired" for 6 months. Anywho... That is the newest unexpected news and journey we are now on. 

Lynleighis the one with clothes on :) Lacey refuses clothes. As I'm typing this she is having a cow wanting her sweater off.

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Is this it? Are things always going to be so hard?

Lots of people fail to understand the pressure and emotions an autistic mom feels.  Having  the dreams you had for your child erased in a blink of the eye, is unimaginable for most.  I struggle so hard with letting go of the child I thought I would have, and accepting that this is my child, this is my daily challenge, this is our life.  I still grieve the child I thought Lincoln would be.  In my occupation I get to play with all sorts of kids, but when a child comes in that is the same age as my Lincoln, it really hits me.  That's what my life was suppose to be. That's what we were suppose to be doing right now.  I wonder if it ever goes away. Is it lack of accepting our autism?  Is it my inability to believe this is it for him?  I don't know. I just know this life is so much harder than I ever dreamed and I long for the day I will enjoy the rewards for the challenges we have faced.

As my little ladies continue to grow and learn, they are slowly passing Lincoln .  That's also a hard pill to swallow.  The looks I see when we're out and Lincoln is going wild in the freezer section (always, always riles him up excited)  are just a few things that reminds me I'm not like the other parents.  It shouldn't bother me that I'm not like everyone else. It just bothers me that they have NO CLUE what our daily life is like.  Even people close to me, have 0 clue.  Screams, meltdowns, charades with him being nonverbal and trying to guess his needs, constant worry, keeping EVERYTHING out of arms reach and locked up, constant spills, messes, diapers, and refusing to go to sleep at night (He is currently bouncing from one wall to the next laughing/playing and he has been up since 4:30am) That is just a few key things that occurs daily in our house. It isn't just every once in awhile, it's all the time. People hate to babysit for me I know. I can't blame them. Yes he is a good kid, but he is busy and you will constantly be moving with him.  I've been trying to take my husband out to dinner for months now. The last time Miles and I were out alone was to see Avengers the movie 4 months ago.

Also friendships are being ended at this stage in my life. I know she hopes I'm dwelling over the fact we are no longer friends, but I'm perfectly ok with it. In short, I don't have time for friends. I'm a horrible friend who does her best to respond/message, but I'm juggling so many balls right now, something somewhere is bound to drop. I do have friends though and they are so great. They are very good at understanding my struggles with Link. Most of all though, they really do love the little guy for who he is and are able to help me out whenever they can. They also are understanding of my lack of contact with them at times.  In short, I'm not a self centered 18 year old anymore who only thinks of herself, so why would I have friends that act like that?  It's for the best and I'm glad I don't have to deal with drama like that anymore.

Work is EXTREMELY busy, but I wouldn't have it any other way.  I'm glad I get away from my crazy life and enjoy the company of other people!  It's a true blessing. It's becoming a balancing act of family and work though now. I'm trying to do my best and do both. Power to me :)

So in conclusion, life is hard. Parenting is hard, but parenting an autistic child is much more challenging.  Marriage is hard. Friendships are hard. Then lastly , work is hard.  Does it get easier? I sure hope so .

Monday, August 19, 2013

Don't go breaking my heart

http://ca.news.yahoo.com/blogs/dailybrew/ontario-police-aware-hateful-letter-telling-family-euthanize-171036930.html

The article above was just found by myself.  Let's just say I was teary eyed towards the end.  Seriously?! Who has the audacity to say that to someone? I would first be upset, but then make a copy of the letter and write a response on the back. Then I would hand deliver it to every house in the neighborhood.

SO SO upsetting!  It's people like this who makes parenting an autistic child so hard. It's the people who think I don't discipline/teach enough (some of which are in my own family) The people who think my child is "spoiled." Those are the people who make my life a living hell. As if it's not hard enough , we have to deal with idiots like the above writer.    So stare all you want at my different child, because in the future you will be staring  at him and how awesome and genius he is.  He may have tons of hurtles you couldn't even imagine going through with your child , but he will get there.  One day at a time, one word at a time, one strong determine momma by his side.

Monday, August 12, 2013

School is almost in session!

Lincoln starts back to school on the 26th of August! I can't wait for this.  Lincoln is bored out of his mind here. We can only play with the water and outside so much. We're getting his indoor swing installed today thankfully!   He is a swinging addict.  The boy could swing and be outside all day long.  Nothing else really new, but wanted to share sweet photos of our family and Lincoln from last month.








Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Team Lincoln goes for a Hail Mary!

Can you tell I'm getting super excited about football season with the title to today's blog :)

Well we finally got the call from the DAN (Defeat Autism Now) doctor!  Dr.Kalb is based in Cool Springs Tennessee, just south of Nashville.  Reasons I like him:
1) He is a normal pediatrician seeing patients as any pediatrician does. Just has a passion to  help defeat autism .
2) He doesn't think we are crazy lol
3) He treats the person as a whole rather than symptomatically .
4) He isn't in it for the $$$ and is a regular $30 copay.

Here is what is going on:

Meeting Dr.Kalb was stressful. Lincoln had a major meltdown for a variety of reasons.  Dr.Kalb wants us to change Lincoln's diet further to a GAPS diet.  I've read about the diet in my books, but I thought Gluten Free/Casein free would be enough for us. Turns out it isn't. He pointed out that since Link's ears turn red when eating corn, and the fact that he goes INSANE if he eats watermelon, shows he still has gut issues. That and the fact that he still has chronic mushy stools.  He said I will never be able to potty train him until it's under control, which I agree.    Dr.Kalb discussed gut inflammation and yeast overgrowth in Lincoln's stomach. I know he is inflamed somewhere, because he talks more when he is on steroids. He randomly will get yeast diaper rashes (often when he has more frequent BMs)  A few other things lead him to believe he is yeasty, such as frequent episodes of laughing hysterically and sleep issues. ALL of this are things we previously felt were plaguing him.  It just felt good to have confirmation that Miles and I were on the right track! Our visit was just the cost of a regular copay. I know some doctors like this require you to pay $300 a visit!

So now that we have confirmation about Link, What will do about it?  

We will start the following supplements and 1 injection (eh) :

Supplement
Comments
Approximate Cost
Vital Spectrum (Klaire Labs)
One teaspoon a day – this is a complete multivitamin and mineral complex powder.
$26.95
Innate Flora - probiotics
One capsule daily provides 20 billion colonies of beneficial bacteria.  These must be refrigerated.  It is best to take them in the morning before breakfast.
$41.00– lasts 2 months
Methyl B-12 injections
One pre-filled syringe injected every three days
$30 
Speak – a combination of fish oil and Vitamin E
Start with one a day and then increase to one twice a day.  Check out the website for Speak which is speechnutrients.com
$51
Children’s DGT Effervescent digestive enzymes
From Theramedix – enhances the digestion and absorption of nutrients – one scoop twice a day with meals.
$20




What will the Outcome be ? 

Dr.Kalb feels that Lincoln will be at a normal child status and drop the Autism label by 6. He seems very certain that Lincoln is a good candidate for reversal of damages done by environmental factors ( SHOTS, pesticides, food dyes ect )

We are going all in. Yes the diet is costly and will be a total change for all of us . The supplements/shots will be about $175 a month, but we are running out of options and time. Lincoln starts school at 6  due to his birthday , thankfully!!  You can't imagine the joy I will feel if Lincoln goes to kindergarten without an aid and is able to do all the things the other kids can.  I will seriously cry if that happens.  If being the key word.  I'm not hopeful, but mostly because I don't want to get my hopes up and it be shattered.  I just have come to the point that I expect something to go wrong, something to not work, or some crazy side effect to happen to us.   Anyways, we're going all in.  We are out of options and the time clock is ticking by before school starts.   So it's all or nothing right now. Here we go ! Time for a crazy ride to hopefully a successful finish.

We go back in October to see him where he will do labs possibly to check for other issues. He is following the DAN protocol for him at this time. Anyone interested in the info he sent to me. Feel free to email me @THREEWISHESPHOTO@YAHOO.COM and I will forward it to you.

ALSO HAPPY 4TH BIRTHDAY LINCOLN!




Monday, July 8, 2013

Open Book

I've now shared our story with the world , aka facebook lol.  It's been good for us.  I was waiting because Miles didn't  want to share it with the world.  Well the day before Miles was informing our neighbor all about autism and his theories. I knew then Miles had accepted it and he too was on the "Bring Lincoln Back" band wagon.  I'm oh so proud of Miles. He is an amazing father. He listens to autism live (some live conference where they discuss autism daily)  at work while he is working . He has even submitted questions and letters to them. Miles has also been in school full time and will be graduating in August!  I'm so proud of him and the accomplishments he has achieved.

Oh how summer break is about to do me in.  Lincoln is now on Tenex and Abilify .  The Tenex is for his ADHD and the Abilify is to help our meltdowns.  Lincoln tends to have major meltdowns over simple things lately. I honestly think it stems from not being able to communicate, but they are out of control and the Tenex for ADHD only magnifies them.  Neither med seems to be working.  We are having to change psychiatrist to one in Madison next month. The one in Birmingham is moving to FL.  Also next month we will have finallllly made it to the doctor in Franklin Tennessee. We will have been waiting for 4 very long months for this appointment .

Not much new to report.  Just same ole' same ole.  Waiting, watching, and trial and error.

Lincoln will be 4 on July 30th this month. I can't believe it's been 4 years.  So many emotions about his birthday. It's hard to be excited, more on that next time :)

For humor sakes: An attempt at a photo of all 3. lol 


melts me every time 

Friday, June 7, 2013

Vaccinations

Several people have asked, so here is a short summed up answer.

Vaccinations aren't for us.  We went according to the CDC schedule for Lincoln and I honestly think it played a role in how he is today. I feel he was going to be different, but not to the extreme he is now. The vaccination toxins played a role in his severity.  His neurologist and psychologist have both told me to no longer vaccinate him, which I'm fine with.

That being said.. What do I do about my other 2?  Well many are unaware but at our 1 yr vaccinations Lacey had a seizure from them. She didn't have a fever, just a seizure. I didn't want to give them in the first place,  mothers instinct again.  I didn't want to give Lincoln any either and wanted to delay them, but everyone thought I was crazy. Now I'm the crazy mom with a crazy kid :) Oh well, we didn't know and we still don't know for sure.   Therefore the girls haven't been vaccinated since 1 and will not until they are at least 5.

This is just what will be working for OUR family. It may not for yours.

The verdict is in

          Lincoln finally got in with a psychologist. He has been formally diagnosed with Autism spectrum disorder PDD-NOS. He is also ADHD, who would have thunk ;). The reason for a quick diagnosis is that our insurance now covers the ever so expensive ABA therapy! Which reminds me , I need to give them another call today to get therapy started. Lincoln started a med for his ADHD, they are hopeful that if we can just get him to "stop" we can get him to vocalize. So far there have been minimal improvements. Sleep issues have been horrid lately with it. We give him melatonin at night and he is up 4 hrs later. Such a battle around here , but we're surviving. In August Lincoln will be seeing a Biomedical doctor in Tennessee who works on recovering Autism. Waiting, Waiting , Waiting. If anyone is graduating and thinking of what to go into, something specializing in autism care is it! ABA therapist are going to be making a KILLING soon. Especially ones who are BCBA (hope that is the correct letters ) certified, because they are the ones insurance covers, well ours at least. Happy Friday folks! Excited to have the weekend off ! 
         

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Back and at it .

Well I've been gone for a few months.  Things have gone from me being hopeful to now being miserable.  I'm doing ok though.  Here is a little fill you in with my life.

Lincoln- Maybe  I should save him for last lol.   He started Lamictal in February for focal seizures. The more he was on it the worse he got. He started to no longer show affection, screaming alll day,  staying up all night, and PICA.  PICA was the worst part I think. He was eating mulch, clumps of dirt and grass. He even got to the point of dragging me to the garbage to get things out for him. He constantly wanted to eat anything and everything.  We switched from it to topamax for his focal seizures. I was hesitant and for a good reason.  I went ahead and started it and he has become very aggressive  . Luckily just towards caregivers. He has also become very mad and screaming mad.  I've said before that Lincoln screams happy a lot, but this is screaming mad!  It isn't my Lincoln at all! We are now weening him off of it and awaiting an appointment with a child psychiatrist.  I'm going insane.  We always go 1 step forward and 20 back.  We go in for his IEP on the 14th with preschool.  I have 0 clue how we will survive the summer together.  His new favorite thing is syrup.  He's sleeping better thankfully!  He is loving on me again and showing affection. So that has been the last 3 months of our life. Medication failures and mommy struggles.

Lynleigh  & Lacey- The girls turned 2! They are doing great!  Both are developing fine. Lynleigh is in speech 4 times a month.  Her speech is actually pretty good. She talks during speech , but wont at home. We know it's there and she can talk, she just doesn't get a chance with Lacey. She also talks very soft spokenly when she does talk.  She still doesn't say Momma or Daddy.  Lacey talks up a storm and sentences!  It's amazing to see and reassures me I'm not a total failure :) .

Me-  Oh where to begin.  I've been exhausted. I've been emotional. I've been busy with my business . I celebrated 6 years of marriage to Miles in March.  We had Miles' 29th birthday last month!   My mother was diagnosed with triple negative breast cancer. Prognosis looks good and it's a blessing it was caught early! She will be enduring chemo and radiation over the next 6 months and I want to be there for her every step of the way.  She is an amazing mom and I only wish I was able to be as calm and collected as her all the time.

That sums up our crazy life over the last few months .  I'm not in the best place right now. I'm back to being mad at the world.   The emotions of being Lincoln's mom is hard.  I'm fortunate there are so many moms out there like me, but I wish there weren't.  It's hard to not know what the future will hold for Lincoln.  It's harder when explaining to others.  He is a very smart boy and just trapped.  His brain has to adapt to us and humanity as we are suppose to act/behave.  He is the happiest thing ever and hyper as can be.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Photo update :)

The ladies are growing growing! Working on a vintage birthday party theme for them in April. They are putting shoes on and off all day long! They love accessories. They are a mess !
Link is doing great with potty training this week! Lots of staying dry! He's a smart fella , just needs a little reminding often :)

MRIs and EEGs OH MY !


Lincoln progressed worse this week.  On Wednesday the school called and informed me that Lincoln started falling and tripping.  Well Lincoln has superb balance and could probably walk a tight rope.  I was officially freaking out!  After a very long day of calls, between the neurologist and pediatrician  ,we got an MRI scheduled for the next day.  I was very worried and fearful for my little fella.

I expected the worse yesterday and to find out he has a tumor.  Fortunately he did well with the sedation and we quickly got the results. His MRI was normal, but he has a significant sinus infection. He is now on antibiotics for 3 weeks!  In all my time as a pharmacy tech, I rarely filled 3 weeks worth of this medicine, so I know it has to be pretty bad.

Next week we will be doing an extended EEG for 24-96 hrs at Children's hospital.   It will be very tough on both of us! He will be hooked up to wires constantly and need to be fairly still. This is going to be a challenge for my hyper active 3 year old!  Luckily he is getting better at listening and is understanding more I think.

He is playing more appropriately with toys now.  He is growing and changing drastically ! Speech is still non existent, but he is doing great with the PECS system!  Keep us in your thoughts as next week rolls around!  It's going to be challenging and we're hopeful to either put the seizure possibility to rest, or be diagnosed with them. Anxious for answers!



It's really weird seeing your kids brain!  If only we knew the thoughts that go through it!

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

WHEW....

Lincoln had tubes on 1/14 unsure if I mentioned that previously. He's doing great!!! He's been a little more verbal (new sounds)and a lot more calm surprisingly.

I'm working a lot lately.  Lincoln is getting sicker in one way, less in others. It's hard!  Lincoln passed out on Thursday 1/24 at school.  He had a great breakfast that day and nothing new.  I took him in to the doctor where the EKG showed something suspicious at first. In the end it was  ok after it was reviewed by a pediatric cardiologist . Talk about scaring me half to death! We now are headed to a neurologist for another EEG and MRI. I'm nervous, but on the other hand I know I've been his advocate to the best of my ability.

My fears are something may be greatly more wrong than just autism.  Last night Lincoln began to vomit, but it has since left. He refused to eat all day, so I guess he was sick all day. I plan to discuss this Thur with the neurologist. Hoping it was a fluke, but no one else has been sick thus far.   I find myself saying "fluke" a lot lately. I don't know if it's me in denial , scared, or nervous, but I just hate the possibilities of what could be happening. SO that being said, we're taking it a day at a time. There is 0 use in freaking out over it currently, when I've done everything I can. Also there is nothing I can do at this point but pray.  Look for an update next week on Link and what the EEG shows. We get the MRI on Feb 25th.

Due to all of the current happenings, we've yet to start anymore bio medical treatment . Maybe when all of this get's sorted out we can continue with that.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Photo Thursday

Wow. It's been a week since I updated. In my defense  it's been WILD around here. Lincoln had tubes put in Monday. That night he mimicked 2 words! I was excited, but it was short lived and he hasn't done anything else since. He has been crazy acting and I know his ears have been bothering him.  On top of all of this school was canceled all week due to snow.  On a very positive note, my husband is off work tomorrow!  YAY!!! My sanity may very well return :)  I'm anxiously awaiting some vitamins for Lincoln from Amazon. Can't wait to start down that path in our bio medical treatment.  I'm cautiously optimistic.  Who know's what tomorrow will bring, may be another 3 inches of snow :) That is a big deal here.








Thursday, January 10, 2013

Photo and Update Thursday :)





Lincoln will be getting tubes Monday.
He has been relatively calm the last few days, it's weird. Still doing well.  Hoping the tubes really helps him feel better. He was great at the doctor this week, he is a trooper. I'm anxious to get the ears fixed. I'm cautiously optimistic that his speech may improve a little. It's a long shot, so I'm not trying to get my hopes up.




Lynleigh- I talk so much about Lincoln, so I figure on Thursday's I will update you on the other two as well .
    Lynleigh is doing well with her speech. She has therapy 4 times a month. She is the shy twin out of the two.  She is such a sweetie and loves pretend play.  She does well with speech, so I aticipate her being caught up by 2 1/2.  She is 8 months behind currently in language.
    Most everyone thinks I'm crazy for doing the speech with her. After the Lincoln situation, I can't take any chances. She and Link have a lot of similarities.



Lacey- Oh where to begin with her. She is quite the pistol.  This week she asked me "What are you doing? "  while I was looking in the mirror doing my makeup. I just replied " My makeup" and she said "Mirror yadadfdsfdsf (un recognizable words lol) She is a chatty Cathy.  She is persistent in getting onto the other kids. If they aren't doing right, I will hear "No, No!"  Most all of the time it's correct too. So she is helping me out :)

Tuesday, January 8, 2013

Bump in the Road

Lincoln will be getting tubes in the coming weeks. He's had an ear infection that has lived through azithromycin, augmentin, cleocin, and 3 rocephin shots.  The infection is as stubborn as it's host ;)  I probably shouldn't have watched the video of tubes being inserted on you tube. It has made me nervous.  Keep us in your thoughts as we prepare for that journey!

I'm struggling with when it's right to share our story with our friends and family.  I'm not wanting pity, I'm not wanting an excuse for Lincoln's behavior.  Quite frankly it isn't any of their business.  If my child is different, what is it to them?  My issue I have now is this :  If I'm 1 in 88 , odds are there are people on my Facebook page or daily life who may very well be struggling as I am.  I want to help them in whatever way I can.  Whether it be someone to relate to, someone to bounce off ideas with, someone to cry to, anything.  I've been fortunate to have a friend who is dealing with the same thing as us.   The type of person I am I want to help. I want people to take from our situation or my words and feel that they too can make it through this.  I want all the moms of the 1 in 88 to be able to look at the situation we have been given and fight with me.  We shouldn't accept that this is it.  Even if this is it, I want to fight to prevent this from occurring SO OFTEN! We have got to figure out what is causing so many children to be effected! If I don't share our story and I hide behind the autism, what good does that do for awareness?  What good does that do for Lincoln? I'm not ashamed of him.  I'm just fearful of being judged and being looked at differently. I want Lincoln to be seen as Lincoln , not Tracey's boy who has autism.  I worry about the label and people not looking past it and missing out on  what an amazing boy he is.

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